Giving it a shot

As I said previously, at my last check up I was advised to lose 40 pounds.  I did start eating healthier while I contemplated this undertaking.

I have a whole lot of issues wrapped up with my weight and body image.  They go back pretty far, into my early teens for sure.  I have spent a great deal of my time beating myself up for being an undisciplined, fat slob.  I'll admit that I look at women who are anorexic and envy their discipline.  How fucked up is that?

But, when I think I'd like to change my bod, I beat myself up for buying into the message the media has shoved down my throat.  I tell myself that I can be healthy and pudgy!  I don't have to conform to the rules!

Now, I'm looking at a high-ish cholesterol level and I have no cardio endurance to speak of.  I really don't relate to people who talk about how running is a spiritual as well as physical exercise.  I've always seen exercise as something to do to burn calories in order to lose weight.

Here I am, stuck between a rock and a hard place.

But, I decided to give it a shot.  I joined a neighborhood weight loss contest.  Everyone participating chips in 10 dollars and the person who loses the highest percentage gets the pot.  This month it's $180. I don't know about you, but I think that's a lot of money.

The kids are on the west coast visiting my parents for 2 weeks.  I'm taking a bunch of days off for my birthday and to go visit my Grandpa Art in California.  I've been able to take the dogs for walks and hikes on my own.  I end up walking more than I intend to on these excursions.  I've averaged 70 minutes a day so far.

While we were in Dallas for my cousins wedding we had regular television in the hotel room.  I caught about 45 seconds of an infomercial for something called The 21 Day Fix. I did some web searches and was able to get the gist of the program.  Calories are kept between 1400 and 1750 for a person of my weight combined with 30 minutes of daily exercise.  If you buy the package, you get a set of containers to measure out your portions and are given a number of servings of each category per day.  Vegetables have the most servings, fats the least and a moderate amount of lean proteins.  It's pretty easy.  I have a little notebook where I'm keeping a food diary.  I'm making sure I eat all my calories, since I know too few can be an issue.

I have swings between being proud of myself and extreme self loathing.

But, my waist is down about 1/2 an inch.  This means it's working.  *sigh*  Onwards we go.  Come on pooches! Let's go hiking!

Amanda's beauty tip of the day:  Keep your spray perfume in the fridge.  It will feel wonderful on the back of your neck.