Why my job is great

I have a tendency to complain a bunch about my job. I really shouldn't, it's a great gig.  Everyone should aspire to my position.  I don't sit around all day eating potato chips and painting my toenails, like some assume I spend my time, but it's a neat workplace.  

As a housewife/stay-at-home-mom/keeper of hearth and home I set my own hours.  I work from my house.  There is no annual review, no written reprimands, no possibility of being fired.  None of these things happen.  I decide what my job description is.  I get up at the beginning of the day and evaluate what tasks need to be completed.  Should I choose to not complete those there's not anything anyone can do about that. 

As long as I'm not abusing or neglecting anyone, I'm golden.  It's better than tenure. 

I can wear my pajamas all day.  I can make other residents of my home get into bed. I control the household diet.   I have the authority to tell them if they don't like what I cooked they can go hungry.  I'm the one who decides if there is dessert served or not.  I'm able to make sure that my laundry is done to my specifications.  

If a member of my household makes the bad choice to suggest that I'm not performing to the standards expected, I have permission to whip around and exclaim "What did you just say to me?!"  It's a nice position to be in.  

In addition to the generous benefits listed above, I'm indispensable.  The family would have a difficult time getting along without me.  And if I'm not happy, nobody is happy!  

Are there days it sucks?  Sure.  I'm sure there are days it sucks to be Bret Michaels. (Dealing with the Blonde-tourage can't be easy) 

Family members get sick and cause worry.  Messes are made in rooms that have just been picked up.  Dogs track in mud or chew on things that don't belong to them.  Because I'm in control of, well, everything, I'm the one everyone asks me many questions everyday.  Even if I put things in the same place every time they ask me where it goes or where it is.  Rain traps us indoors with nothing that the kids want to do available.  There's no sick time, 401k or lunch breaks.  I'm on call 24 hours a day 7 days a week.  

Luckily,  I've got YouTube and Peggle to keep me sane.  Pass the chips.  

Amanda's beauty tip of the day:  Keeping the ends of your hair trimmed will give your 'do a sleeker, shinier look.  Find a school of cosmetology to have your split ends trimmed for very little money.